01/05/2014

So, it's only 5 days into the year and I haven't blogged once. I guess it could be worse.

This year, like I stated in my previous post, is about focusing on myself and learning to love me and learn how to improve myself. I think one of the main things I struggle with is patience. I don't handle slow things well, I don't appreciate people who ask obvious questions, and I hate sitting still for longer than 5 minutes. I've been impatient my whole life.

I've decided to try and find a word to focus on each month of this year. January's word, if you haven't guessed just yet, will be patience. I hope to be able to find ways to focus and better myself each month by picking a word that is something I need to improve on. I'll try to find quotes on patience that I will share or find Bible verses that speak of patience. I most definitely will try to practice patience in my every day world.

Please pray for me and encourage me as I start my journey to become a better and more patient person.

12/29/2013

Nothing good ever comes out of me being alone because my mind starts racing and I start thinking about the most random things. This week, it's been about why I am the way I am.

A new year starts on Wednesday so naturally I started thinking about what resolutions I wanted to make; lose weight, be a better person, love myself, save money.. "Whoa. Did I really just say 'love myself?'" And bam, that's when the over-thinking started.

Essentially, if I'm being entirely honest with myself, I don't like myself. If I do, it's in a very small amount. I'm selfish, lazy and have stopped being the girl who loved life 110%. I feel like I've just been going through the motions lately and I've been failing at that too.

There's so many things I need to work on this year with the biggest being that I need to learn to love myself. I think a lot of things that bother me about myself revolves back to the not loving myself.

In 2014, I want to focus on me. I want to take stupid selfies when I feel pretty and I want to learn to believe in myself so I can believe that I can lose weight and do good in school instead of just half assing everything. I want to hold myself accountable with this blog by blogging everyday and focusing on the good and bad of the day. I want to be a better friend, daughter and girlfriend. I want to love my boyfriend until it feels like my heart is going to explode and put him and his needs before mine. I want to be selfless and loving. I want to read more books. I want to dance when it's inappropriate and sing every song I hear.

Beginning on Wednesday, I want to love myself and my life 110%.